in a world you once lived in
by lealila
Summary: They always find thier way back. Or: in which life happens and the Titans continue on. Multiple one-shots spanning throughout time. More or less canon-compliant.
1. All the Secrets

_**this is a multiple one-shot fic that focuses on those moments where the titans come out stronger than ever. think of: aftershock II. or: haunted.**_

_**you should know that this isn't a romance fic. at least, if there is romance, it is only implied and/or minor. also: i plan on focusing on canon moments, but may/will eventual work into non-canon moments. **_

_All the Secrets (in a world you once lived in)_

_they always find their way back. or, in which life throws curveballs (usually villains) and the titans continue on._

—_aftershock: raven_

Can't breathe can't breathe don't cough can't breathe don't cough no no _no_—

Think. Focus. Find the Titans find your friends find them find them _don't breathe_—

There! Through portal, through bricks and mortar and everything until—

_Release_. You tumble out, hands and knees on the rocky ground, heaving coughing _breathing_. Emotions blur and so do your eyes. Someone's telling you to _breathe damn it breath now, please, raven c'mon breathe_—

More coughing and heaving until finally—_finally_—the mud finds its way out and air finds its way in. Someone's hands are on your back back, rubbing it; a breach in protocol, but the gesture is soothing, in a way, so you promise yourself not to mention it later. You don't know how much time passes before you breathe easily again, but when that moment comes, you sit back against the rocky wall you phased out of, offering thanks to your friends who retreat away from you, back to where they must have originally sat. You almost apologize, but don't, knowing that they won't take; they'll say something about friends and how they're supposed to. So instead, you observe, assess their injuries, burn the mud off your skin and clothes, and wait for Robin like the rest of them.

Starfire, Cyborg, and Beast Boy look relatively fine—some scratches decorate their faces, nothing more. But Starfire has a gash on her forehead; it's not bleeding, but doesn't look pretty. And if it doesn't get healed soon, infection will start to set in. And they've all got concussions that are going to be a hassle if you don't fix them soon. But still, you ask—you can't sense anything else, and better safe than sorry.

"Is everyone alright?" They all nod, of course. Really; sometimes, you don't even know why you bother trying.

When you walk up to Starfire with blue hands, she doesn't look surprised: just a little sad, and a little relieved.

"I fell off a cliff," she says in explanation.

"More like you fell on a rock," you mutter.

"That's why I fell off."

She doesn't mention how or why the rock fell on her, but you suspect it has something to do with Robin: you're catching glimpses of his worried face as you plummet—

Done. You retreat from her mind, and she smiles her thanks. You almost smile back.

You turn to Cyborg and Beast Boy, both looking equally worse for wear. At least all they have are minor concussions, but they have more scratches than the alien girl. Cyborg shrugs when you cock a questioning eyebrow.

"We fell down a hole. Beast Boy made sure we didn't fall hard."

"But he didn't make sure nothing fell on _you_."

He relents, and lets you heal his concussion. When you approach Beast Boy, he doesn't look you in the eye, doesn't nod, and doesn't do anything. But when you finish healing him, he thanks you. It's unfeeling and monotone and not-quite hollow, but you know better. He's just in shock, is all; just trying to regroup himself.

Sighing, you sit back against the rocky wall. After that fight with Terra, and then healing your friends, you're tired. But you can't meditate now, even if you wanted to.

"How'd you end of breathing in mud?"

You glance at Cyborg, and pull up your hood; more habit than anything: you're used to hiding behind it when you feel uncomfortable or too sad or too fearful or… too much of anything, really. "I was drowning in it." You don't need to explain more: they all know_ her _powers, and they all know you fear mud, fear suffocation.

You catch Beast Boy's eyes (the first time all day) and you see nothing but emptiness—like _she_ gave him nothing but a concussion, gave him nothing after all he gave _her_.

Something snaps in you, like it did in that warehouse. Something snaps in everyone—you're all standing glaring _furious_ at what she did to one another. _Furious_ at themselves because you could've taken her down, you could've prevented her from hurting your friends.

"No more chances," Cyborg spits out, his normally calm façade gone.

"No more trust," Starfire says with a fury that's rarely been witnessed by the Titans—or anyone, actually.

"And no more mercy," you hiss.

_(you could've taken her down you could have you could have—)_

"She's just another criminal," Beast Boy adds, sounding bitter, tired, and young.

"And we're going to stop her."

Starfire lights the cave suddenly with her starbolts, revealing a dismantled Robin. He sounds just as furious as the rest of you.

"No matter what it takes."


	2. On My Skin

_**head!canon as to what happens after the episode "go!" in fifth season.**_

_On My Skin_

_their memories are like photographs: with time, they start to fade. or: the beginning of the end._

Robin remembers everything before his oath, and certainly before his titans. He was nine when Batman took him under his wing and gave him a new alias—gave him _Robin_. Robin was fourteen, on the verge of fifteen, when he stumbled upon superhuman teens that looked to him for guidance, and he looked back with ideas of new starts.

(He admits, long after their first encounter, long after defeating the Brotherhood that he wasn't really looking to work alone.)

The start is rough and for a month, before they're all living in the same house continuously, before they start to _talk_, no one knows how to break the ice. Or in Starfire's words: _glorfak hertiol. _But they try. They all learn soon enough that Titans are good at trying.

"On my planet," she says shyly, two days after their first meeting, "new friends gather to have a…_banquet_ to 'break the ice'."

Cyborg shrugs. "Sounds fine to me, but where are we gonna prepare this feast? In case you haven't noticed, no one knows how to cook."

They've been living in a small apartment—Cyborg's apartment—while they decide on if they're really ready to start this superhero team, if they're ready for the responsibility, and for each other. Their diet consists of Chinese take-out and meat. Meal-time is the only time they actually spend to together. Cyborg works to pay off the rent, and Robin doesn't know where Raven or Beast Boy go, but Starfire stays with him at the apartment. He starts to think that maybe, they aren't ready for each other.

Maybe Starfire's idea is the only way they can start.

"We could have pizza," Beast Boy suggests. Cyborg nods immediately and Robin's quick to agree also. It's cheap, and and casual, and _everyone_ can eat pizza—even the vegan Beast Boy.

Starfire and Raven look at the changeling in confusion. "What's pizza?" Raven asks.

The boys stare at the girls with mouths agape.

"You guys mean you've never had _pizza_?" Beast Boy is shocked and quick to shove them in the direction of the nearest pizza joint—the same one where they all met. "Dudes, we're totally having pizza tonight."

And two hours later, they are. Robin and Cyborg both devour a single large pizza, watching Beast Boy question—or pester, from the look of irritation in Raven's eyes—the girls, wondering if they're enjoying their first-ever pizza.

"Super," Raven drones, picking at her slice.

Starfire agrees with the enthusiasm Raven never has. "Oh, yes! I am most enjoying this 'pizza'. Tell me, what is _in_ pizza?"

"Well, the basic ingredients consist of cheese, tomatoes, and bread. What goes on top of it is entirely up to you," the changeling explains.

Starfire mostly gets it, but it's not hard to catch the slight burrow of the brows indicating her confusion. She's about to ask more, but Robin supposes it's time to bring up their future.

"So…I think we should be a team." That came out way blunter than he meant, not at all what he was hoping for, and Robin feels a blush creep on his face as they all stare at him.

"A…team? All of us, working together to fight the bad guys?" Beast Boy looks shy, suddenly, and just a little hopeful. Robin nods. Another moment of silence goes by before he's all energy and smiles again. "Dude! That sounds _awesome_!"

"Yeah man. We worked great against those lizard monsters!"

"Oh, yes! We can protect our new home!"

They all look eagerly at Raven. "I…I'm not really the 'hero' type."

Beast Boy laughs. "Dude, you were the one that stopped all those gecko freaks. You saved _everyone_."

She looks away. "You guys really don't want me around, either way. If you knew what I'm capable of—"

Cyborg cuts her off. "Raven."

She frowns at him from across the table. He frowns back, continuing. "Raven, we don't care. We're your friends, and you having nothing to worry about."

Her eyes soften just a bit. "I—okay. I'm in."

"Woot! We're a team now!" Beast Boy yells, excited.

"Glorious!"

"If we're a team, we're gonna need a name," Cyborg says.

"What about Titans? I mean, we fought like the titans and stuff," Beast Boy suggests.

"Titans, eh?" Robin nods. "I like it."

"What about _Teen_ Titans, though? I mean, we are teens and I like the double letter," Cyborg adds.

"Me too!"

"And me also!"

"Yeah, sure. It's fine."

Robin tries to hid a grin—well, sort of tries—and holds his hand in the middle of the table. "The Teen Titans?"

Cyborg, Raven, Beast Boy, and Starfire all lay their hands atop of his, one after another. "The Teen Titans," they echo.

Days later, when they—well, Robin and Cyborg: Raven outright refuses, and Beast Boy and Starfire don't quite know what to say—approach the mayor with plans of protecting the city, he's ecstatic. Apparently, Jump City has been having trouble with super criminals for almost a year now, and has been unable to get the JLA or other, somewhat rogue, heroes to come and help. Mayor Killigan can't promise much of a pay per person, but offers $60,000 a year, what a normal four person family makes in these parts.

"After all," Killigan says, "you five are like a family, right?"

Robin and Cyborg don't quite know how to respond, so Robin just holds out his hand.

"Deal."

Cyborg looks a little dubious, but Robin knows where to get a little extra money if they need it.

The first action they decide to work on is getting to know the police force. They will be working together, now, and should figure out some sort of…not schedule, but understanding: the Titans aren't here for dealing with gangs and drug dealers and the criminals without suits and masks—they'll help, of course, if need be, but will otherwise stay out of the police's way.

The Titans take this order from Officer Lorenzo with the grace of adults.

When they get out of earshot, they snicker for hours.

The house—their Tower—their home—gets built in a month. The builders are amazed: with all the high-tech computers and security equipment, they thought it would take six months. But Cyborg and Raven and Robin help the electricians; Beast Boy and Starfire drag the heavier items from place to place, saving time and money. And when the Tower is finally complete, they spend a day shopping for furniture, all while getting to know each other: what they like, dislike, what they do for fun, a little of their past, and a lot of their hopes and dreams. When they get back home, rooms are claimed and if you are Raven, bordered up, and they all silently tour their new home, trailing after one another.

Finally, when they end up back in the living room, Robin speaks, breaking the silence that has reigned all afternoon. "So…how does everyone like it?"

The Titans break into smiles—even Raven.

"I think," Starfire says, "we love it."

A few moments of silence before Cyborg breaks it. "Who's up for pizza?"

An hour later, they sit at their dining table—a solid oak with black legs: Raven pointed it out first, and the rest fell in love simultaneously.

They chatter amiably for hours until the computer alerts them of trouble. A stone giant whom they will later call "Cinderblock" just escaped from jail and their help is needed. They drop everything at Robin's "Titans, go!" and go rushing off to save the city they already call home.

This is the beginning, Robin—and Starfire and Raven and Cyborg and Beast Boy—will someday realize, of the end.


End file.
